It's Sunday and I'm in the office. That's not the worst part though. The guy in the office nextdoor is also in, and he's spent the whole 3 hours i've been in here yelling on the phone. Jeez, enough already. Can't you confine the yelling to regular business hours? I didn't come in here to listen to your domestic squabbling on the phone. Silly new employees. I may be argumentative, but at least I don't resort to yelling louder to make my points. You all can thank me for that later. Time to turn on some loud Me First.
(a viewer's review of "In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Seige Tale", a videogame-based film that has gotten universally negative reviews. Uwe Boll, the director/producer, likes to take videogames and make horrible movies out of them.)
"I went to this movie expecting the worst. Because of Uwe Ball's previous work I was a little hesitant. Oh how I was wrong! The story is about a man named "Farmer" who has to run around all day killing people to save his beloved wife. Oh how he loves her so very much! You will never forget the courage, the bravery, the love in this film. Not to forget the special effects and dramatic action! Uwe Bell has truly changed the way I will look at life, and I'm certain he will do the same for you. Hollywood will change because of this film. The impact it has on you, oh dear lord thank you, thank you for everything! Be sure to take all your friends and loved ones to see this movie, I'm sure after the 2 hours 30 minutes they will thank you."