Today I bought a new pack of socks just to put off doing laundry. Yes, a new low of laziness has been reached.
Actually it's not as bad as it sounds. I had to stop by the post office this morning to pick up a package (Rome season 2) and as I was leaving I was upset that I was going to have to leave work early to do laundry tonight. "I just did laundry less-than a week ago too, how can I only have one pair of clean socks left!!!" At that very moment I noticed that the discount-store I was walking past had socks in its display. 6 pairs for $5 because they're "slightly imperfect". So I went in and bought a package. I don't care about them being slightly imperfect. Hopefully they're wearable, but I don't really care, so long as they're clean. Hardly anyone ever sees my socks anyway.
(a bunch of people are crowded around a computer)
me: What's going on in here? Looking at porn?
Gabe: Noooo. We're thinking of getting a gift for New-Guy Joe.
(they call the other Joe "new-guy joe" because he's been in office for a fairly long time)
me: Is it his birthday?
Gabe: In December.
me: What are you thinking of getting him?
Gabe: ...A mail-order bride.
Mike: It's the gift that keeps on giving!